I've always tried to be as honest as I can on my blog-from admitting to buying knock offs to admitting to struggles with my weight, insecurities etc etc and today I decided to share with you something which may be even more personal-my struggle to feel like I am where I belong or headed towards where I need to be.
Being a blogger makes you vulnerable in ways you may not understand at first glance. People somehow acquire the right to judge not only your sense of style, but also your physical features, lifestyle and insecurities. You put your flaws in the spotlight and under the radar and scrutiny of whomever feels like looking at your photos and commenting. You wish to grow your following but at the same time; worry that with more followers, comes more haters. Scrutiny from strangers is a part of the job when it comes to blogging and boy can it make you doubt your place in the blogosphere. With everyone doing perfectly contoured make up, rocking red bottoms and/or placing 5 packs of Brazilian, Malaysian and Peruvian hair on their heads, I personally sometimes feel like I may not fit in but guess what- it's actually a good thing. I recently realized that I blog for content, I do not blog to fit in. Likes and comments are nice but I have to remember why I started blogging in the first place. It's not a popularity contest (although sometimes even I find that hard to believe).
New fashion bloggers also have to know what they wish to accomplish as a blogger-are they blogging to get popular? Share styling tips? Help people of a particular niche or just brag-trust me there are all these types of bloggers and some types can make you feel inadequate or as if you need a lot of money to maintain a successful blog. It almost seems like every type of blog already exists and no one is unique anymore or if they are, they're trying too hard but I try my best (and trust me, it's hard) to not fall victim to trends and what I call "rich people problems and dilemmas." I can't go out and buy a Louis Vuitton bag with the coins I got right now so all I can do is aspire to reach that level one day rather than deceive y'all that I live this rich and high class life. Remember EVERYONE looks and puts their BEST on social media. Don't be fooled. My sister actually said something which may be true. She's been trying to reach out to an old classmate of hers who is actually a popular blogger on Instagram (whose name I shall not disclose obviously), but the girl always seems to have an excuse as to why they can't meet up. My sister honestly feels like it's because this young woman knows my sister will see that the lifestyle she has created for herself on Instagram is nothing like her real life style. My sister says she may be ashamed to have someone who really knew her from when they were kids, see that she's been fooling people on social media. Now my sister may be wrong...but she may also be right.
Confession: For quite a while I thought I wanted to become a stylist-note that this is after I thought I wanted to be a doctor and then a nurse. I thought to myself-people seem to like the way I dress, I like putting pieces together and I love fashion but I recently realized that I don't think that I want to be a stylist. I don't love the fashion industry THAT much, lol. I love dressing up and shopping but I want to do is far more than styling. I also want to do consulting, branding, own businesses, own the rights to a TV series, perhaps have my own fashion line one day and more. I'm so driven and confident I will achieve all of these dreams one day but blogging is just 1 portion. The fashion industry is cut-throat and pretentious and to be honest, pretty saturated in the Western world. I wish to take my dreams and talents to the motherland!
Well, I think I'm done rambling, haha. My home-made muffins are calling me. Please sound off below with your thoughts.